Sailing Away

Our second week in Belize was dominated by a fantastic sailing trip from Caye Caulker in the north to Placencia in the south. We were joined by 11 other travellers (including our Strayian buddies Carrie & Brett - don't believe the hype, not all Strayians are wankers) for the three day trip on 'Dis n Dat', a 40 foot fibreglass yacht.

The trip allowed us to fish, snorkel and sail during the day, while nights were spent camping on little offshore islands (cayes) eating the catch of the day, after which the rum punch and banter flowed. The fishing wasn't too bad, with Mat hauling in a couple of barracuda and managing to snare a crayfish while snorkelling on the second day, before the hangover kicked into overdrive and left him at the back of the boat laying a burley trail. The photo below is Mat - his tan is fully locked in now...

Along with the Strayians, we had a great mix of other travellers onboard, including Random Dave and Doctor Lisa from Vail, Scuba Steve and Claire from Vancouver, and the lovely Sophie from Oxford. That leaves two others - a couple of young ladies from New York who became fondly known as Tweedledum and Tweedledummer.

These two units seemed to have thought they'd booked onto a P&O cruiseship, and thus provided us and the crew with numerous laughs and frustration during the trip. The two man Belize crew of Brown-Man (Brrrrrooooooowwwnnnnn) and Charlie couldn't stand them and were more than amused when one of them got craked in the head with the boom.

This was in fact so hilarius for Charlie, a 60 year old rasta with a drinking problem, that he fell ovberboard laughing as he cried out in creole (broken english) "I told da stupid bitch she getta clonked in da fookin head'. This incident reduced the number of brain cells shared between our two New Yorkers to 1.


En route, we camped at English Caye, which has a permanent population of 2 - a father and son lighthouse keeper combo. Father was on the mainland, so we spent the night drinking and catching up with the son who has lived on the island for over 40 years. Some great stories shared over the 'One Barrell Rum', and then an offer at 2am from him to take us on the 12 mile trip in his 12 foot dinghy to visit the Belize City Casino... maybe next time.

In Placencia, we grabbed an apartment (using the term loosely) from an ex-pat American named Big Stan who spent the best part of an hour explaining everything we needed to know about Placencia, including the fact that Mrs. Bouyole made the best bread on the island, but Norman made better cinamon buns.


We also took the opportunity while having access to a kitchen to cook up a couple of feeds (the first home cooked meals since we left Aotearoa) and to visit the local bottle store (a parked semi trailer with a container on the back) to stock up on belicans for a night of card playing.

We're now in Belize City after our first chicken bus ride (the term given to ex-US school buses which feature heavily in Central and South American bus fleets). The ride was memorable for the speed bumb we took at pace which led to Mat being catapulted from his seat into the roof, a couple of feet above him, and for a local who screamed at the bus driver constantly in creole to slow down - "notta goin ma grave yet batty boy". Concern rises when a local complains about the drivers poor skills.

Where on to Gautemala now, a week later than expected and with a trimmed down itinerary. Hope all is well, and for those following the journey, no automatic alert for the last Belizean blog was sent so please look back for other tales from Belize (featuring a quiz night and karaoke).

You'd Better Belieze It!

Writing from the laid back island town of Caye Caulker, where the official and anal itinerary prepared by Mat prior to departure from New Zealand has us in Tikal, Gautemala. Itinerary shuffled and budget exceeded again, we are going to be in Belieze for another week - no obvious reasons to escape this little piece of paradise in a hurry!

Our entry to Belieze represented our first land based border crossing of the trip. A pretty relaxed affair where there were no forms to complete, no fees to be paid and one Belizean official asking if the was anything we wanted to declare? "Not really" was our response, and with that, border control waved us through and back onto our bus to Corozal.


Corozal is a pretty sleepy border town half colonised by the Chinese and where the locals are exceedingly friendly and relaxed. Our time here was spent with a couple of Aussies (Flash and Laura) and a Brit (Tina) where we exchanged travelling war stories over a Belican (local brew) or 10. Flash and Laura are well travelled, and Flash had us in hysterics all night as he re-called some cracker tales of Tamazapan and booze induced antics in Thailand.

A fantastic night out at Patty's Diner where travellers are invited after their meal to scrawl some prophetic statements on the walls about their Corozal expeience. Fair to say that after the numerous Belican's, the words flowed, only to find at the end that our message had been addressed to 'Paddy', as apposed to the owner, 'Patty'. All was forgiven however with the first drunken haka of the trip.


From Corozal, it was on to the northern Cayes, where after a night at the more touristy San Pedro, we ventured south to Caye Caulker, an Island we have been unable to leave since. Caye Caulker is about the size of Manner's Mall in Wellington, population 800 (no Blanket Man though) and only a few hundred metres from the barrier reef. We've been staying in a purple beach side cabana on stilts (to avoid them being washed away during cyclone season) where the hammock out front has been put to good use. The sea breeze blowing in at night has been fantastic, though we did have one night where the torrential rain (6 inches in 30 minutes - sounds like a dirty movie title) kept us awake.


The primary activity during our first days on the island was diving, where we racked up six dives and 5 hours under water. The coral reef here is very impressive, as is the marine life. Plenty of moray eel, a few turtles and the odd shark make for a great diving experience. When not diving, we've been book reading while working on the tan (Mat is still yet to peel after nearly two months of travel and numerous time out of a Ginger's favourite environment - the shade).

Eating has been the other activity on Caye Caulker that has featured prominently in our daily highlights. There are a fantastic range of options, from the beach side BBQ of seafood to the dirty chine on the cheap side of the island. All meals have agreed with the system (still running a perfect 0 on the sharts) and are served in Belize time - usually 90 minues after one has ordered. No issues though as there is always something to keep one entertained between courses.

Over the last few days, we have been joined on the island by Brett and Carrie, Strayan friends we met in Mexico. We racked up a boomer night early on which started with a second place effort in the local quiz night, narrowly defeated by a team called 'Bobby's Smelly Finger'.


We were beaten on the final bonus question where we'd wagered the full 10 points and got the answer in early in the hope of winning the pitcher of Belican on offer for the first correct answer. We blew out after missing a crucial mathematic step, but for those playing at home, what is the next number in the sequence:

1, 4, 13, 40, 121, 364....

The numerous 2 for 1 'Panty Rippers' (Malibu and pineapple juice) consumed during the quiz had us in high spirits, so next stop was the local karaoke bar for a power ballad (you can take the boy out of the Realm karaoke nights, but you cant take the Realm karaoke nights out of the boy). Soon after Brett and Mat concluded there rendition of Air Supply's 'All Out Of Love', the owner decided to stop karaoke for the night. No worries though as Mat & Brett turned their attention to ripping up the sand dance floor.


We also spent a fantastic afternoon snorkelling the reef, during which we found ourselves in nipple deep waters with 20 stingrays while our guide Carlos threw fish into the water to create activity. Fair to say that Mat squealed like a nervous little girl every time a stingray touched his legs, and thoughts of Steve Irwin's tragic death were ever present as stingrays flashed underneath us at pace.

We board a yacht tomorrow with 9 others (including Brett & Carrie) for a three day journey along the barrier reef tomorrow where snorkelling, fishing, camping and the consumption of copius quantities of panty rippers fill the agenda.

Once Upon A Time In Mexico

Firstly, a shout out to our newest reader, Mason John Herd, born on the 8th of May. Congrats to Pip and Darin on the latest addition to the family tree and we look forward to Jacob and Mason forming a classy halfback / 1st five combo for the Tasman Makos in seasons to come. Secondly, a handy lesson learned in bringing this report to you as the power has failed twice – save entries often…

We're back in continental America and have just spent 7 days in the Yucatan province of Mexico, on the eastern coast with the warm waters of the Caribbean Sea never far from our journeys. We managed to hook up with a couple of Strayans (Australians – Brett & Carrie) on our first night in Playa del Carmen and promptly headed out for 'mucho tacos y cervesas por favor' (an adaption on Bree's instruction that the only Spanish we needed was 'mucho tapas y cervesas por favor'). The Mexican taco is nothing like the kiwi variety constructed from aisle 7 ingredients available from your local Countdown. Consisting of a round flour tortillia no bigger than the palm of your hand and mystery meat, at 4 pesos (40 cents US) a hit you can't go too wrong and 3 is never enough.

It was fantastic catching up with fellow travelers for a couple of days and we had two good nights out with Brett & Carrie. Playa del Carmen is a bit of a tourist destination, with diving and water sports the bread and butter of the economy. The plethora of restaurants and bars along the main pedestrian street are all offering deals, so 2 for 1 Coronas and Margaritas were the drink of choice. And at the end of a big night out and with no kebab shops in sight, the 4 peso tacos are the best stop on the way home.

From Playa del Carmen, we made an epic journey inland to Chichen Itza, a significant Mayan ruin widely considered a modern wonder of the world. Despite the attendance of 3,000 other travelers, the near 40 degree heat and the 2,999 locals hawking god awful merchandise, we had a fantastic few hours wandering around the remains of this ancient Mayan city.

Our primary reason for visiting Playa del Carmen however was to get underwater and put our newly acquired Scuba diving skills to work. After a tour of a few of the 60 diving shops in town, we teamed up with Klaus (aka Klausiano Pavarotti), a German Master Diver and heir to the Bayer Asprin fortune (a fact confirmed with a google search). First up Klaus took us into the Caribbean Sea for two dives on local reefs. The diving was amazing, with 30 metres visibility, and marine life for Africa.

Buzzing from our first dives with Klaus, we threw the budget out the window and signed up for two further dives in the local Cenotes. Cenotes are inland limestone caves and caverns flooded with freshwater for which the Yucatan Peninsula is renowned. Only 300 people have died in Cenote dives, but Klaus assured us they were nearly all Dive Instructors who were too big for their boots/fins.

Diving in this environment takes you 20 metres underground, through narrow passages which open up into massive caverns filled with stalactites and stalagmites. Soon after entering the Cenote, all natural light is lost and navigation relies on your flashlight and staying to marked trails. This experience was out of this world – it felt more like we were in space than underwater at times.

When Klaus is not taking people diving, he is taking the people he dives with out for a good, cheap Mexican lunch. This led to a surreal moment on a Cenote dive, where 20 metres underground we surfaced in a small air pocket, no bigger than a bathroom. While taking in this amazing environment and feeling the serenity, Klaus breaks the silence - “Do you guys like chicken? I know a place in Tulum that does good chicken”. Klaus was right – this place BBQ’s whole chickens (flattened out), of which Klaus consumed one while we stuck to a half.

We stayed on in Tulum where we took to the beach, staying in a thatched roof Cabana ON the beach. From here we explored the only coastal ruins of the Mayan civilization known to exist and now inhabited by a healthy population of iguanas (which led Mat to have a few Steve Irwin moments as he investigated their habitat). We also had a magnificent meal here at a place named Mezzanine, a beach side bar with a beautiful Thai restaurant, owned by a young Kiwi couple. A great set up, though unfortunately a month earlier an Israeli backpacker went missing, presumed murdered, during a night out there.

Tulum was also the local for Mat’s first case of the ‘Mexican Two Step’, a tummy bug that is best experienced within two steps of a toilet. We decided however to flirt with danger and headed an hour out of town to more ruins, this time set in the jungle, and to walk 5 miles in the blistering heat. Thankfully there were no incidents (or ‘sharts’ (*see below) as we like to call them) and a couple of Loperamides later we’re running as normally as can be expected in Mexico.

Our next week sees us cross the border into Belize where the focus of our travels will again be underwater. We’re traveling well and meeting more people as we go which has been great. A month left in Central America, and then we head south. Happy Mothers Day to Pam and Meg in Aotearoa - we downed a lot of Sol's in your honour...

* A ‘shart’ is an attempted fart that is in fact a shit, a fact only discovered after one attempts the fart.

April Sun In Cuba (and some May sun as well)

Hola Amigos! We write having just experienced an amazing 8 days in Fidel's Cuba. We spent the bulk of our time in Havana, staying in the old part of the city with a local family in a casa particula (Cuban B&B withouth the second B).

We tackled the city by foot on a daily basis, checking out the amazing architechture, numerous musuems and the even more numerous (no thesaurus on hand sorry) monuments to the leaders and heroes of Cuba's revolutionary history. Havana was a step back in time as the old cars rolled past, the son musicians played and the locals went about there business.

A highlight of our walkabout was the Musuem of the Revolution. Not because of the superb way in which the Cuban story is presented (think of a school project with access to a dot matrix printer and some clearfiles), but for some of the snippets of information found along the way. Little known facts such as the introduction by the CIA of viruses to wipe out sugar and pork production, the immense role of Cuba in space travel (the Russians took a Cuban into space during the cold war) and some incredible social statistics (100% literacy rate and 37 liver transplants completed per month) make for an enjoyable voyage through Cuban history. The tributes to Che Guevara's role in this history are numerous, and are seen on most streetscapes.

While navigating Havana's cobblestone streets is a breeze, understanding the currency is not. Cuba operates a dual curreny, both called the peso, though one 1/24th the value of the other. This can lead to purchases of an ice cream for either US$1.20 or US$0.06. The local (cheaper) peso is only good for street food, but armed with 240 local pesos, we ate our way through the city. Pan con Lechon (pork sandwhiches) garnished with a generous serving of crackling at 5 local pesos lead the consumption list, with 18 in a five day space, closely followed by helado (ice creams) and queso (cheese) pizza. Pan con Lechon also lead the list in likely causes of Caroline's dodgy tummy. Night times were spent at restaurants where the big peso reigned supreme, as did grande cervezas (big beers)....

By coincidence, we happened to be in town for 'Primero de Mayo', the 1st of May celebration of the Cuban worker. In essence this is a communist rally in celebration of the revolution, where Fidel addresses the masses (1.2 million of them) in the 'Plaza de Revolucion'. Given the opportunity to see the socialist movement in all it's glory, these two gringos took to the streets to check it out, and soon enough found ourselves in amongst the masses and marching towards the memorial to Jose Marti (Cuban revolucionary poet) with a million others. Unfortunately, Fidel did not show, further increasing speculation that the nation's leader is no more. Raul did make an appearance however and looked splendid in his military greens while rambling about the threat to food security as a result of US policy on increasing use of bio-fuels (or corn petrol as he called it in the paper).

On our travels of the city we came across the US Embassy. Anti-American feeling remains pretty strong with some fantastic propoganda in the form of bill boards flanking the embassy. Favourite amongst the options was the billboard with images detailing that George Bush + Condoleza Rice = Hitler. Under the Bush administration, the US Embassy has increased it's interest in organising anti-Castro groups in Cuba. To this end they constructed a scrolling LED screen on the side of the embassy late last year to publicise to the Cuban people it's thoughts on the Castro regime. In a fantastic response 2 days later, Cuban authorities erected some 137 flag-poles directly in front of the embassy to block all viewsof the LED. On public holidays the Cuban flag flies, but at all other times of the year, the flags are black with a single white star in the middle.

Mat took the opportunity in Cuba to learn a little more on the revolution and the Castro regime by picking up a copy of 'History Will Absolve Me', Fidel's famous 1953 defense of the first failed attempt to spark the revolution (a good read with a couple of Bucanero's while listening to Son music). Paraphrased, Fidel was a pretty articulate bugger in 53 and had some great ideas for a new Cuba. 50 years on, Fidel's dream is yet to be realised as unemployment runs high, infrastructre is lacking (just the 5 electricty brown outs of more than 5 hours duration while we were there!) and the common Cuban struggles from day to day. The people remain proud of their history though and loyal to the revolution's aims.

We escaped north for a couple of days on the coast, staying with another local family, with our casa only metres back from the beach. A great break from the hussle of Havana, we were able to work on the tan and make some plans for Mexico. Happy to report that Mat has not peeled once since departing Aotearoa over a month ago, has bedded in a semi decent/noticeable tan and evidence of this will be provided in a future blog (stay tuned). The tan is the result of constant exposure to 30 degrees plus, which in Cuba leads to pretty impressive thunder storms every couple of days.

On to Mexico next where scuba diving will be the activity of choice. We hope you are all well wherever you are. Adios, nos mantendremos en contacto. Vamos de Makos. (Bye, we'll be in touch. Go the Makos!)